Prior to the introduction of China and Tea roses to Europe, roses grown there bloomed once per season; bear in mind that the climate for northern and central Europe is characterized by relatively short summers. Most roses would come out of dormancy, bloom, and go dormant again, all within a relatively short time span. While the China and Tea roses brought repeat bloom to Europe, they were not reliably cold hardy in northern reaches. Rose Autumn Damask, introduced into Europe almost two thousand years (yes, twenty centuries) before either China or Tea roses was in fact the first remontant rose introduced into Europe.

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So I was sitting around planning my latest bit of debauchery - I can’t go into too much detail but I can say that it involves scarecrows and snorkels and no bunny rabbits this time. Anyways, I stumbled, yes stumbled across the shiny depravity of the Faux Whore, Magdelyne Swallows. And I’m all like ‘what the hell?’ Sometimes in life we have to pay tribute to the audacity, the boldness, the courage that we find around us.

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Considered one of the most disease resistant of all Hybrid Teas, Kardinal reaches four feet or so, with an upright, vigorous habit.  Leaves are medium green, semi-glossy, and resistant to blackspot and mildew.  To avoid confusion with another Kardinal rose introduced in 1934, Kardinal is officially known by its code name KORlingot. The rose by the name Kardinal which you will surely find in most garden centers is this 1986 red Hybrid Tea.  By whatever name, as the saying goes, this one is a winner (although the smell is not that sweet! - there’s hardly any scent at all).  Kardinal is an excellent, perhaps the best, choice for those who desire a red rose of classic florists form AND want reliable behavior.  Kardinal bears medium-sized dark red flowers on long stems.  Form is excellent; the flowers are exhibition quality.  Repeat bloom is reliable, coming in distinct cycles rather than continuously.

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A sport of Red Coat, David Austin English Rose Dapple Dawn bears large, four to five inch blooms of single-flowered form. Warm pink petals move to a creamy white color towards the center of the bloom, and prominent yellow stamens add to the relaxed character of the blossoms. Due to the informality of the flowers, Dapple Dawn makes an excellent choice for the informal or cottage garden. Growing to a robust eight feet, Dapple Dawn does best at the back or middle of the border. Dapple Dawn’s flowers are borne continuously throughout the entire season; often the shrub will be covered in a mass of bloom. Despite a general healthy and vigorous demeanor, Dapple Dawn is slightly susceptible to blackspot.

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David Austin Cottage Rose has lovely, soft pink flowers that are to my eyes at least superior in color to the blooms of its famed parent Mary Rose. Blooms are produced in abundance throughout the entire growing season; Cottage Rose does indeed meet David Austin’s goal of developing plants of old rose character that rebloom reliably (although, there have long been roses which rebloom throughout the season - for example, Souvenir de La Malmaison - one of the best).

Growth habit is bushy, covered with medium green foliage. Cottage Rose has only light fragrance.

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Grandiflora rose Gold Medal provides lovely flowers of Hybrid Tea rose form in a constant stream. If you are seeking a tallish rose that will produce deep yellow flowers of good form, then Gold Medal just might be the ticket. Rich, dark gold blooms open to fine flowers of deep yellow tinged with red. Long stems hold aloft flowers of good substance which will last long on the shrub and as cut roses. Many readers are by now familiar with the story behind yellow roses and blackspot, but happily, Gold Medal is a yellow rose that seems to be more resistant.

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Achingly beautiful, Hybrid Tea rose Brandy is the epitome of understated elegance. Well-formed flowers are the picture of the ideal for which other Hybrid Tea roses aspire, although the flowers do quickly mature from the ‘perfect’ stage to a rather open, informal form. The color is a rich apricot; fragrance is good, with a fruity bouquet. Prior to continuing, if you are new to Hybrid Tea roses, you might want to read a classic treatise by Henry Mitchell.

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Blooming once in midseason, Gallica rose Tuscany is an old, old rose. Referenced as Velvet Rose by the herbalist Gerard in 1596, Tuscany bears semi-double flowers of dark, rich, red. Golden stamens complete the picture. A larger version, ‘Tuscany Superb’ (also known as ‘Superb Tuscan’ and ‘Superb Tuscany’) is often found in Old Rose nurseries.

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Introduced in 1930, Betty Boop is notable because she was the first cartoon character to represent a fully-sexualized woman. Garter belts, prominent breasts, Betty Boop was no Minnie Mouse, what with a debaucherous parade of characters endlessly trying to look up her skirt (at least until Production Code censors put an end to her antics in 1934). Betty Boop: flapper, sex symbol, and now a rose.

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When I was 22 or so, I read the following essay by Aldo Leopold. It stuck with me through the years and has shaped me as a man. Thoreau and Leopold warn us about losing a part of ourselves. I give you “Thinking Like a Mountain” by Aldo Leopold…

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